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How to always have interesting conversations

Writes Kaj Sotala:

One, I’m by nature more of a listener than speaker. I usually prefer to let other people talk so that I can just soak up the information being offered. Second, my native way of thought is closer to text than speech. At best, I can generate thoughts as fast as I can type. But in speech, I often have difficulty formulating my thoughts into coherent sentences fast enough and frequently hesitate.

Both of these problems are solvable by having a sufficiently well built-up storage of cached thoughts that I don’t need to generate everything in real time. On the occasions when a conversations happens to drift into a topic I’m sufficiently familiar with, I’m often able to overcome the limitations and contribute meaningfully to the discussion.

Basically: develop my Slipbox / note pile. In particular, pay attention to bridges between topics, maybe turn them into flashcards.

Also kajsotala.fi/2015/10/two-conversationalist-tips-for-introverts/

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What links here

Created (3 years ago)

Debate scripts

Prompted by this idea:

It would be incredibly useful to have worked out some “personhood interface” respecting scripts that I could call whenever I noticed a particular problem that was stymying the conversation.

www.greaterwrong.com/posts/ufn3eQWfLCLhg5m4u/increasing-day-to-day-conversational-rationality

Script 1: During a casual argument, put disagreement on hold

i.e. don't do deep topics "in passing", to protect both participants against idea-inoculation.

“I’m getting the sense that we have fundamentally different perspectives/​understandings of X, and that continuing to casually arguing about it is just going to trick us into thinking we understand each other when we don’t. I suggest we either step up our game and really try to explore each others beliefs carefully, or we postpone this discussion to when we have more attention and time to do so.”

Key points:

  • Acknowledge the gap
  • Acknowledge that this should be approached carefully
  • Create the possibility of continuing with renewed vigour, or for deferring.
  • (For this script to be truly complete, one would need to have mechanisms in place for continuing conversations with people.)

Script 2: Check premises

"I’m worried that I’m not understanding [you/​your position] because I have a different understanding of what it means to [X/​be X]. What does [being X/​Xing] mean for you?"

Script 3. Explore a dependency to lessen inferential distance

"I think that we should pause this argument and talk about this tangent idea for a bit, really focus on it, discuss it, and then come back to this one and see what changes."

  • Make sure the other person understands you intend to return to the main argument and that this isn’t a diversionary tactic.

Script 4. Inform about alarm bells

"I don't want to give the appearance of agreeing because what you said sets off alarm bells somewhere in my head, but I'm not sure why".

Script 5. Ask for clarification while clarifying that you're not doubting them

“I think I might understand your intent, but the words you said confused me. Could you rephrase that?”

More scripts that would be useful to formulate

  • Pointing out a possibly divergent Communication culture between you
  • Having a reset button where you drop whatever the current thread is, take a breath, and both recenter on what your central thesis are.
    • I often realize halfway through a conversation that I’ve ended up arguing for a position that I don’t care about/​support, and it’s very hard to recenter from there in a way that isn’t incredibly jarring to the discussion.
  • Introducing an idea that you think has promise but you’re not totally sure you endorse (in the spirit of “brainstorming”)

"Oh, I am so familiar with this feeling. The inferential distance is like an abyss, and I feel like the rest of humanity is beyond my reach."

This is why I think one of the more useful scripts to have is the one for communicating, “I think that we should pause this argument and talk about this tangent idea for a bit, really focus on it, discuss it, and then come back to this one and see what changes.”

Even though you still bear the burden of trying to explain, you’ve at least created a space where they are giving you new idea thought, as opposed to being focused on the original issue and mostly ignoring your tangent.

Other thoughts relevant to debate

  • How to make good conversation while sure you have the correct answer
  • How to listen

What links here

Created (3 years ago)

Rationalism vs. empiricism

[…] there were historical groups called the rationalists and empiricists, where the empiricists were all about doing experiements and looking at the world, and the rationalists were all about figuring things out just by thinking.

(your definitions for rationalist vs. empiricist are off. Per SEP, the usual definition is some variant of ‘rationalists think we have some innate knowledge, while empiricists think we get all our knowledge from experience’.)

This distinction was always fake. The Wikipedia page on Rationalism begins with portraits of Descartes, Spinoza, and Leibniz. Spinoza was a lens grinder who worked closely with astronomer-physicist Christiaan Huygens and wrote in his magnum opus, Ethics, that we only know about things in the world through our bodies interacting with them. It is unclear to me how it is possible for someone to be more committed to looking at the world. The Wikipedia page on Empiricism begins with portraits of Francis Bacon, John Locke, and David Hume. Hume’s An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding includes the following, which implies that abstract mathematical reasoning is one of the two valid sources of knowledge, and refers to experimental reasoning:

"If we take in our hand any volume; of divinity or school metaphysics, for instance; let us ask, Does it contain any abstract reasoning concerning quantity or number? No. Does it contain any experimental reasoning concerning matter of fact and existence? No. Commit it then to the flames: for it can contain nothing but sophistry and illusion."

Alberto Vanzo argues that the modern philosophical ‘rationalist vs. empiricist’ dichotomy comes from Kant and early Kant-influenced thinkers. Though the dichotomies ‘rational vs. irrational’ and ‘reason vs. experience’ are both much older than the term ‘rationalist’; e.g., Francis Bacon in ~1600 was contrasting ‘rationalis’ with ‘empiricus’, though this was talking about dogmatists vs. experimentalists, not talking about the modern (Kant-inspired) rationalist v. empiricist dichotomy.

Thanks, Rob! I agree with this summary. It is unfortunate that “rationalism” has this standard usage in philosophy (“rationalist vs empiricist”). This usage is not completely unrelated to the “rational vs superstitious/​irrational” distinction, which makes it more likely to confuse. That said, outside of the fields of philosophy and intellectual history, not many people are aware of the rationalist/​empiricist distinction, and so I don’t see it as a major problem.

If I try to steelman the Rationalist-Empiricist divide:

Empiricists think that arguments justifying organized violence are nonsense so we ought to ignore them, do what we like instead, and argue about math and science.

Rationalists think that arguments justifying organized violence are sketchy so we should investigate them carefully as hypotheses for how mind organizes itself in the world. [because rationalists think the mind has to do with everything?]

www.greaterwrong.com/posts/DtcbfwSrcewFubjxp/the-rationalists-of-the-1950s-and-before-also-called

Created (3 years ago)
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